My New Friends

And I have so many these days. It is really quite lovely. I feel wanted and important. I am popular!

 

Each evening my mail box is full of treasures offered by my new friends at Talbots, Black and White, Arhaus, Macy’s, Crate and Barrel… The list goes on. Actually, I think some of my new friends have told some of their friends about me because I get mail from friends I didn’t even know I had. Regardless, each of them begin with: your “friends” at LL Bean (or Sundance, Garnet Hill, Frontgate) want you to have this special offer because we value you so much. Really! I am that special. They mean it too. I know because they are so generous! My friends offer me special gifts, free shipping, 20% off and no payment until 2013. I am deeply touched by their thoughtfulness as I relax on the couch with their lovely, glossy catalogues. I know they have invested their hard earned money, their time and their energy to send these to me-their new friend.

At the bottom of the stack of mail, or sandwiched in between two of my new friends correspondence, is often a lonely white envelope. It is not friendly at all. It doesn’t even say, “Hi.” It has no pictures of gorgeous men and women. It has no pictures at all, no special offers or gifts. It simply says,”Pay this amount, by this date, or we will charge you more next month.” They don’t even say please. How rude.

 

I have decided I don’t like them. They are not my friends.

 

Oh yeah-my new friends have mentioned they want more friends. I can send them your name if you would like.

 

Then we can all be friends together!

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